Where did you grow up and what was your childhood like? Did you have any particular experiences/stories that shaped your adult life?

I was raised in Texas with horses, chickens, and dogs. I’m so grateful now because I’m not sure the rural life is for me anymore, aside from travel time-to-time. I was a tomboy and wanted nothing to do with shopping, girly clothes, or hanging out with my peers.

Although I was on the school dance team, I was much happier by a creek or on my horse. I reminisce about dirty feet, sweaty clothes and not wanting to come inside until I absolutely had to.

We had bat caverns behind my house so, at sunset, my friends and I would ride our bikes with our shower caps on so the bats wouldn’t get caught in our hair. The sky at dusk was black with bats as they swarmed out of the caves in search of food.

I climbed old Texas oak trees, ate outside on picnic benches and it felt wonderful to be so connected to nature. One time when my parents were out of town, I walked my horse into our house, down the hallway, and into my room so he could see what it looked like. My parents had given me a new bedspread and lamp and wanted him to see it!

My relationship with animals had me interested in animal and pack behavior which then propelled me into my career as a hypnotherapist. Our primal and animal instincts are in the subconscious, this was a natural progression and blend of what I love about the animal kingdom.

As an avid animal lover, strays or any animal in need ignites my heart. I believe you know a person best, by the creatures they nurture.

What is something you wish you would’ve realized earlier in your life?

So much! Where to start with that question? I’ve rationalized what I didn’t know, one of the great benefits of our fabulous coping strategies in the subconscious mind, so I’m comfortable now with what I didn’t know.

However, I would have been more present than I was but I get that I was running like the wind to create who I was meant to be. I had a sense of urgency about life that I’m not sure served me well. Then again, it might be the only reason I’ve had the success I’ve had.

The funny thing about life and time is that you can only know the result of how you lived it. You don’t get to see the outcome of the variations or the sliding doors.

What are bad recommendations you hear in your profession or area of expertise?

Rather than bad recommendations what I hear mostly is the misconceptions about hypnosis and trance. Many people believe, mostly because of television and film portrayals, that you’ll rob a bank if you get hypnotized, seriously! They believe the hypnotherapist can make you crow, bark, dance naked, or anything you’ve been programmed to do.

Clinical hypnotherapy is nothing like stage show hypnosis where people perform silly acts in front of others. It’s really about remembering past events (sometimes even lifetimes), changing perspective on events that need reframing, and shifting negative habits into positive ones. Our subconscious has the ability to realign with what is good for us when life gets us off track.

Trance is a natural state of being, similar to daydreaming or drifting off to sleep. We enter trance many times a day, much like the screensaver on our computer. The subconscious is the layer of consciousness just below (sub) the layer of our conscious mind. Trance feels good and gives our subconscious a chance to redirect habits or improve our performance, relieve anxiety, and all kinds of negative behaviors.

Tell me about one of the darker periods you’ve experienced in life. How you came out of it and what you learned from it?

I would say it was a realization that certain friends were not friends at all. The overwhelming feeling was disappointment however when I became clear and unemotional about it, I had to ask myself a few hard questions. Just because people disappoint us doesn’t give us any dominion over how they live, learn their lessons or mess up in life.

Why do I think they should behave honorably to me if they have life lessons to learn or emotional growth to work through? The beauty of this bigger thought is the freedom to end friendships that never really were, a standard never really held or a sisterhood that really never was.

Others don’t owe us certain behavior, that’s their journey. The most liberated I ever felt was from the hardest lesson I learned . . . people have their mistakes, problems, and character arcs, just as I have many of my own. Some friendships may survive and some may not but most of all, either is okay. Change can feel sad but growth regardless of the form is always good.

What is the one thing you do that you feel has been the biggest contributor to your success so far?

There are actually two things that contribute to my success.

I have an uncanny ability to see the larger picture of someone’s life, attitudes, and filters that got them to my office. It’s my gift. The science is the science of hypnosis however the art of hypnosis is my wheelhouse. I believe because of my observations since the time I can remember, I can feel my way through just about any experience fairly quickly.

Optimism plays a tremendous role in my success because I know people can change. I’ve seen too many transformations so I remain in the spirit of growth. I’m more surprised if someone isn’t changing throughout their life than if they are. Back to my mantra Expect the Exceptional.

What is your morning routine?

I naturally wake up by 6:30 am each morning and always have. I like to linger in bed with my dogs and coffee before the day starts so I really protect my morning ritual. My pups are an important element of joy for me so even if I have an early plane to catch or reason to wake up as early a 4:00 am, I reserve time to cuddle with my dogs before starting the day.

Unless I’m vacationing, I skip breakfast having my first meal no earlier than noon. I like to feel hungry, I like to crave certain foods, I’ve become friendly with appetite anticipation, a term I created. In the mind, we all want something at any given time. When I put my want on food, yes I’m a foodie!, I get to romanticize my meals. What am I going to eat for lunch? How will it taste? Where will I have it? It’s a way of putting reverence and thought back into consumption and making an event of the meal so it satisfies all of my senses. It’s like a meal extender, (does anyone remember that meat additive?) it bulks up the experience and makes more out of it.

After coffee and cuddle-time I head to the gym (in my home) and dance just to warm up, nothing serious or structured; just feel-good dancing to my favorite songs. Afterward, I lift weights, then I clean up and head down to my home office for tele-sessions until I break for lunch between 12- 2 pm.

What habit or behavior that you have pursued for a few years has most improved your life?

Writing has improved my life the most. I write to relax and to perform better.

My book Subconscious Power: Use Your Inner Mind to Create the Life You’ve Always Wanted (Simon & Schuster/Atria Books) would never have been if it weren’t for this habit. When I was contacted and asked to write a book on self-help I already had so much content from my previous writings.

My book in turn, has been so helpful to so many that it came back to me 10-fold from the experience of releasing all of this information. It reminds us the Law of Reciprocity is alive-and-well and that energetic circuits enhance our lives.

What are your strategies for being productive and using your time most efficiently?

I schedule myself just like you would a child. When I’ve been my happiest I’ve been on a pretty tight schedule. When I’ve had my darkest times, I’ve been off that schedule. I schedule just about everything so that a lot gets accomplished. Yes, the days go fast but I have so much to show for it and a sense of accomplishment by day’s end.

As adults, we sometimes feel too ‘together’ to manage our day like a child but I credit this strategy for the happiness of myself and my clients, as simple as it may seem.

What books have influenced your life the most? Why?

For the mind, I’ve really grown from The Gift of Fear by Gavin DeBecker and loved it so much, I integrated the lessons into my own book Subconscious Power: Use Your Inner Mind to Create the Life You’ve Always Wanted (Simon & Schuster/Atria Books).

Gavin compelled me to study more about our animal instinct residing deep in the subconscious. The beauty of his book is the application of what we already have, our primal intuition, and how recognizing it can literally save your life. He depicts examples of victims and their powerful subconscious minds that had they paid attention to these natural impulses, they may have fared better.

For the body, I rely on the lessons of the book One Bowl: A Guide to Eating for Body and Spirit by Don Gerrard.

One of my mantras has been to add reverence to your food and this book is gold for adjusting your mentality around your intake amount. In this country, we are so blessed with abundance that it’s easy for hedonic adaptation to kick in leading us to eat more and more. Staying in check is easier with this one-bowl method of food consumption. It re-aligns us with our needs rather than our desires.

Do you have any quotes you live by or think of often?

“Expect the Exceptional”- Kimberly Friedmutter

This quote of mine reminds me to push forward when I often feel like receding inward. My habit is to be happy with less than I originally wanted and this quote really turns it around for me, mostly when I really have to push to create something great. I’m fairly easy to please so this saying keeps me on my toes!

“What if it’s easy?”- Kimberly Friedmutter

Another reminder to keep a positive attitude about things that might feel hard to do or feel like a stretch to accomplish. I’ve found through the decades that the more you expect easy, the more you find easy. Try it, it works!