Arielle Ford is a leading personality in the personal growth and contemporary spirituality movement. She has been living, teaching, and promoting consciousness through all forms of media, for the past 30 years. Ford is a celebrated love and relationship expert, author, speaker, and is the co-creator and host of Evolving Wisdom’s Art of Love series. Her mission is to help women Find Love, Keep Love and Be Love.
Where did you grow up and what was your childhood like? Did you have any particular experiences/stories that shaped your adult life?
I was born in Miami and grew up in Hollywood, Florida in a very middle-class neighborhood. I spent a lot of time at the beach and swimming in the calm, warm waters of the Atlantic. As a teenager and young adult, drugs, sex, and Rock n Roll was my focus (I was a terrible student although I managed to graduate from the University of Florida). I feel fortunate that I am part of the baby boom generation because we had the best music. I saw so many greats on stage and at festivals including the Rolling Stones, The Doors, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, James Brown, Jethro Tull, Tina Turner, The Who, The Allman Brothers, etc. Back in those days you could trust your drug dealer and sex couldn’t kill you, so I was definitely a participant in the Summer of Love wave.
What is something you wish you would’ve realized earlier in your life?
I was very fortunate to learn the powers of the Law of Attraction and Manifestation 36 years ago, but I do wish I had learned it much earlier in my life!!
What are bad recommendations you hear in your profession or area of expertise?
The one that makes me craziest is regarding “self-love” and the false advice given that you must love yourself before anyone else can love you. I believe this gives people, especially women, the impression that they have to be fully in love with themselves before they are worthy of love. Not true! If you suffer from self-loathing, then get professional help before seeking soulmate love, but for the rest of us humans, please know that your soulmate will love you including your perceived imperfections. And, once you have a soulmate, and you see how much they love you, you will LOVE yourself even more.
Tell me about one of the darker periods you’ve experienced in life. How you came out of it and what you learned from it?
I was once unexpectedly fired from a job. I had left a great job to take this new one, I was promised the sun, the stars, and the moon, and then, 90 days later, I was let go and in a state of shock. I found the courage to fulfill a dream of living in Los Angeles and moved from Miami to LA without any plan: no job, no place to live, and not much money. On the plane ride to LA, I read “Creative Visualization” by Shakti Gwain and immediately began the manifestation lessons I learned in the book. Within ten days I had a job, a place to live, and a new best friend. Getting fired turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me. I would not be who I am today had I not had the blessing of getting fired.
What is one thing that you do that you feel has been the biggest contributor to your success so far?
Nearly every personal growth, self-help book, and spiritual teaching I learned through books and workshops have all contributed to my success, happiness, and abundance. I will say The Hoffman Process and Landmark Education’s The Forum were both life-changing experiences for me.
What is your morning routine?
I usually wake up around 6:30 and lie in bed for about fifteen minutes, sometimes I do a CALM app daily meditation, sometimes I do deep breathing, sometimes, I check my email. It changes from day to day. Around 7, I say hello to my husband (he is up way earlier) and he gives me a big hug to start the day. Then I make a cup of coffee with almond milk and stevia and put it on a tray with Aussie Bite muffins, some blueberries, and peanut butter and enjoy breakfast in bed and I watch a little news. Around 8 am I work out for a half-hour, usually on my Elliptical, or take a walk around the neighborhood. Then I take a nice long aromatherapy bath and do a gratitude practice. I’m generally at my desk before 10 am.
What habit or behavior that you have pursued for a few years has most improved your life?
There are two: For more than 30 years I have practiced the art of Wabi-Sabi – finding beauty and perfection in imperfection. I am no longer a perfectionist and I look at life through rose-colored glasses. Since the start of Covid and lockdown, I have found that living my life in two-hour segments keeps me grounded and happy. Since it’s so difficult to make plans in these uncertain times, knowing I can control two hours is a big help.
What are your strategies for being productive and using your time most efficiently?
As a writer, I allow myself time to daydream and think about my writing. I often get ideas while walking or in the bathtub. I try to never pressure myself. I did enough of that when I was younger and very ambitious and tried to squeeze success out of every second. Now I just want to have as much fun as possible without deadlines.
What book(s) have influenced your life the most? Why?
The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz
I have an incredibly bad memory, but the lessons of The Four Agreements are for me, unforgettable, and they changed my life. I was already familiar with “doing my best” and “keeping my word” but the idea of “never making assumptions” was mind-blowing.
For the first time in my life, I began to think in a more critical way, taking the time to ask myself if what I was thinking was an assumption, and if it was then I would ask better questions, or look for more evidence. Learning not to take anything “personally” was a big gift to my nervous system. I began to understand that no one was waking up in the morning plotting ways to make me miserable and if I was miserable it was often because I took something personally!
I am grateful to Miguel, and his brilliant publisher, Janet Mills, for making this wisdom available to the world.
- Never make assumptions
- Don’t take anything personally
- Always do your best
- Keep your word
Do you have any quotes you live by or think of often?
Two of my favorites are: this one from A Course in Miracles:
“The only thing missing in any situation is that which you are not giving.”
And this is another favorite:
“It’s a both/and world. It’s both the way you say it is and the way I say it is.