Sara Davison, best known as ‘The Divorce Coach’, is one of the UK’s most sought-after authorities on break-up, separation, and divorce. She is an NLP Master Practitioner, with 20 years’ coaching experience. Davison is also the bestselling author of the Uncoupling – How to Survive and Thrive after Break-Up and Divorce and a media commentator on this topic.
Where did you grow up and what was your childhood like? Did you have any particular experiences/stories that shaped your adult life?
I grew up in a happy family home in Hertfordshire with my parents and younger brother. When I was in my twenties and busy running my business, out of the blue, my Mum suffered a brain hemorrhage and a stroke. She was left paralysed and in a coma for many months. It was touch and go for a long time as to whether she would survive and – if she did – whether she would walk or talk ever again. Amazingly, she defied medical science and made an almost full recovery for which I will always be extremely grateful. The experience had a deep impact on me. Friends and family had rallied around us and helped up to get through those dark days. Up until then, I had thrown myself into work and not had time for anything else – not much socialising, definitely no dating, and no relationships. Work was all that mattered and I prioritised it above all else. My Mum’s illness made me realise how important family was and for the first time in my life I wanted to start a family of my own.
What is something you wish you would’ve realized earlier in your life?
You have to be your true self to be truly successful in life. I spent many years trying to be like other people I admired. I felt I had to be more like them to achieve my goals. It was only when I realised that when you are truly authentic and accept yourself – weaknesses, faults as well as strengths and abilities – then you can really start to shine. That’s why I encourage the Breakup and Divorce Coaches who join my training programme to find their own niche and define their own coaching personality. Sure – some people won’t like you – but that’s ok! That’s life! Getting comfortable with your uniqueness is key to being happy too!
What are bad recommendations you hear in your profession or area of expertise?
Time is a good healer is a very true adage but I think it encourages people not to step up or take responsibility for making positive changes. You can speed up your healing process from a breakup by learning more about yourself and taking certain actions. Yes it can push you out of your comfort zone at times but it also enables you to learn the lessons of the past so you don’t keep making the same mistakes!
Tell me about one of the darker periods you’ve experienced in life. How you came out of it and what you learned from it?
Sometimes the worst moments in your life can turn out to be the best. When I went through my divorce I experienced some of my darkest times, however, I now use those tough lessons I learned to help others and have created a global business helping people around the world to cope better with their breakups. I couldn’t have seen it at the time but it was a blessing in many ways.
What is one thing that you do that you feel has been the biggest contributor to your success so far?
I couldn’t have achieved my success so far without such an incredible team around me. I enjoy working with individuals who are as passionate about their work as I am about mine. I need experts in other areas to grow my business, including marketing, PR, accounts, and admin. So I have a carefully chosen team that excels at what they do but is great fun too. The combination of passion, talent, hard work, and fun means that we all pull together to get the results we want.
What is your morning routine?
Being a single mum, my weeks vary when I have my son with me, and when he is with his Dad. My alarm usually goes off at 6 am so I can shower before I wake my son up for school. I drink fresh ginger shot to give me a natural boost of energy before I make a bowl of porridge with berries. After the school run, I drive straight to the lake near my home and have my morning run. I listen to podcasts and enjoy being out in nature – whatever the weather! I then head back to my office to start work around 10 am.
What habit or behavior that you have pursued for a few years has most improved your life?
I have learned to look for the good in any situation that upsets or frustrates me. It helps me not to wallow in feeling sorry for myself and to find a way out of tough challenges. It’s not always easy but over the years it has become second nature and it’s been a great habit to teach my son too. Kids are like sponges and absorb these ideas super quickly!
What are your strategies for being productive and using your time most efficiently?
Identify what time of day you are most productive and maximise those times! For me I work best between 11 am-3 pm and 6-10 pm so I tend to break my day up into those time slots. I also make sure I am spending my time on the things that I can do well and outsource the things I know I’m no good at – like accounting! Having a lovely space to work in is also important to me so I am relaxed and comfortable with everything I need set up to maximise my efficiency!
What book(s) have influenced your life the most? Why?
Awaken The Giant Within by Tony Robbins – I read this when I was in my early twenties and trying to figure out my path in life. It really changed how I viewed the world as I began to believe I could achieve whatever I set my mind to if I was passionate about it. I had been taught at school to think my only option was to work for other people and I didn’t believe I could run my own company. This book literally ripped off my blinkers and inspired me to set up my own business in the personal development industry at 21 years old and I haven’t looked back since!
Do you have any quotes you live by or think of often?
“It’s not what happens to you in life that defines you, it’s what you do about it that makes you the person you are” So many of us go through tough times and it can seem like there is no light at the end of the tunnel. We may not have a choice about what happens to us, but we do have a choice about how we react to it. How you deal with the tough times will shape who you are. You may carry the scars of the challenging times but they certainly don’t have to define you.
For more information on one-to-one coaching, or to book onto Sara’s virtual breakup retreat, Heartbreak to Happiness, please visit www.saradavison.com.
Please also check out Sara Davison’s new podcast, Heartbreak To Happiness, for Sara’s expert advice on how you too can get on with your life to heal, grow and move from heartbreak to happiness.
For more information on how you can become a Divorce Coach please visit: https://sara-davison.mykajabi.com/dcap-webinar-free-training-opt-in