Violet Lange is a relationship mentor and podcast host. She helps successful, spiritual women find and create healthy, lasting love. Lange is the founder of Executive Sutra, a premier wellness organization for leaders, bringing yoga wisdom, tools & practices to the business world, and Violet Lange Coaching, a company that helps women reclaim their feminine essence, feel amazing in their bodies, and become empowered in love.
Where did you grow up and what was your childhood like? Did you have any particular experiences/stories that shaped your adult life?
I grew up in Lincoln, Nebraska until I was 12. We moved to Utah for a few months, and then to Minnesota. My parents were both teachers and that’s part of why I love to learn.
What is something you wish you would’ve realized earlier in your life?
Relationships are everything. As are boundaries.
What are bad recommendations you hear in your profession or area of expertise?
“Dating is a numbers game”…when in fact it’s an energy game.
Tell me about one of the darker periods you’ve experienced in life. How you came out of it and what you learned from it?
I came out of healing through sexual trauma through somatic therapy and shadow work…I learned that my intuition and body sensations are critical, just as important if not more so than my thoughts. I held the vision of being in a healthy happy partnership with a thriving family. I came out of learning my daughter was born deaf by being committed to my vision of her hearing and playing at Disneyland with her cochlear implants. Vision and tenacity helped with both of these situations.
What is one thing that you do that you feel has been the biggest contributor to your success so far?
Make a list of my desires, honor my desires, instead of focusing always on productivity. We are taught to do the hard work first and then reward ourselves, but when I reward myself first I always have more abundance, fun, and ease, and the results happen faster.
What is your morning routine?
Wake up. Create my sacred energetic space with grounding to the earth and setting an intention and color for the day before getting out of bed. Lemon water then freshens up, then bone broth with Freya Radiance herbal supplement. Spend time with my one-year-old daughter. Check email and calendar at 10 am or so.
What habit or behavior that you have pursued for a few years has most improved your life?
Yoni egg practices keep me grounded, excited about life, creative, passionate — very important for women especially those who deal with anxiety or feeling like they are not enough or are people pleasers.
What are your strategies for being productive and using your time most efficiently?
I keep an old fashioned to-do list on a post-it — simple but effective. And I follow my pleasure — it makes my day the most efficient as it takes zero willpower and everything always gets done.
What book(s) have influenced your life the most? Why?
I love epic fiction like Shantaram by Gregory David Roberts and anything by Isabelle Allende, for getting out of my head and remembering the flow of life. In terms of self-help books, so many have helped me it’s hard to know where to start: Courage to Heal by Ellen Bass, The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk, Women’s Anatomy of Arousal by Sheri Winston, The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, The Fourth Trimester by Kimberly Ann Johnson. I believe being our best in business and life requires looking at our trauma and shadow.
Do you have any quotes you live by or think of often?
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” — Eleonore Roosevelt