Where did you grow up and what was your childhood like? Did you have any particular experiences/stories that shaped your adult life?

I grew up in Northern California. We moved a lot. I was born in Santa Cruz, raised all over the South Bay, and eventually, our family moved out to the Valley. 

My parents divorced when I was in the third grade and I was raised by my father. Each year that I get older I realize how special my father was. How instrumental he was in shaping my adult life even though he’s missed most of it. The sacrifices he made are too many to count. The best things my father taught me he lived out and are a part of my life and businesses today. 

My dad was great at always sharing the positive things on his mind and he was the best gift giver (on an extremely low budget). Although he has been gone for many years and never saw the woman and entrepreneur I became I know exactly what he would say to me. He’s the reason I gift all my clients and the reason why when I am thinking something positive about someone I pick up the phone or email, text, etc. to let the person know. When I pass away, I want everyone to know all the wonderful things I think about them. I don’t want to take any of that to my grave! 

Although, I grew up in father’s home my mother’s presence was always felt. She’s my angel on earth and all I wanted to do was grow up to be like my mom. I followed in her footsteps to become an executive assistant. I could have never known how much joy I would receive being an EA. Nor could I have imagined how far the role would evolve, not to mention starting my own virtual assistant business. 

My father taught me how to treat and take care of people in life. My mother taught me how to assist and make people’s lives easier in business. They both taught me what a gift and honor it is to serve and assist others. 

What is something you wish you would’ve realized earlier in your life?

I wished I would have known early on I was smart. It was only after a few years in business that I realized I was smart! 

I am a middle child and my older sister and younger brother excelled in school. They were both part of the honor classes and never had to study. I barely made passing grades and gave up on myself early in school. Everyone in my family excelled in math and science, my mom and sister included. I didn’t understand I could be smart in other ways. I thought there was something wrong with me. I didn’t understand that I didn’t have to be the best in those two areas to be considered smart. 

A few years into my business clients, colleagues, and VAs started sharing with me what they thought I must have been like in school. I laughed out loud at what their idea of me was. I now know that if I had focused on what I was good at instead of what I wasn’t I would have excelled in the areas I wanted to and would have also been a better math and science student for it. 

What are bad recommendations you hear in your profession or area of expertise?

The worst recommendation that I hear and one that I received myself many times was to change my title of virtual assistant. Being an assistant is in my DNA and I won’t ever change that title. My title doesn’t define my value or expertise. It shares with the world the kind of person I am. My title doesn’t command more or less money. I’m an entrepreneur and that means I hold the power for it all. Title changes are for employees not for business owners and entrepreneurs. Likewise, I don’t ask for raises. I charge what I want according to the value I provide. 

Furthermore, it’s bad for SEO. You can come up with extravagant titles if you wish. However, if you don’t have a full book of business and are looking for clients, good luck being found. Potential clients are searching with the term “virtual assistant”. Now, I will add you have to state what type of VA you are. For instance, I’m a Virtual Assistant Matchmaker.  

The title change is one of many bad recommendations VAs receive, but at the root, all bad recommendations point to an employee mindset. Before any VA takes advice from someone, they need to ask themselves if they are thinking with the mindset of an entrepreneur or an employee. 

Tell me about one of the darker periods you’ve experienced in life. How you came out of it and what you learned from it?

In 2012 when my husband committed suicide it was definitely a dark period for obvious reasons. It also put me into a unique category. I became a suicide survivor of not only my husband but also my father who had committed suicide years earlier. I quickly had to ask, “What am I supposed to do with this?” As quickly as I spoke the words the answer came, help others. 

The first people I was intended to help were my own children. It’s a strange thing to have in common with your children but I am glad it is me. I was able to help them get through the process in a way that made sense and with an understanding that most people thankfully will never know. 

I’ve also been blessed to share my story with other children and adults alike. There tends to be a lot of guilt, shame, and secrecy when it comes to suicide. Being open about my experience has not always been easy but it’s always worth it when the person who needs to hear it the most does.

What is one thing that you do that you feel has been the biggest contributor to your success so far?

I make time for others. My business tagline is, “Because you can’t do it all yourself…” and that goes for me too. I don’t always know what I’ll need or what I’ll be asking for next. I do know there will always be something. I’m grateful to people who made time for me and expected nothing in return. I do my best to pay it forward. That includes taking surveys and writing book reviews. 

What goes around comes around. I can’t ask for what I’m not willing to give. I do my best to give and provide value to those who might never ever be able to repay me knowing that I have received the same. Besides, it feels good to give!

Giving or not, I’ve never stopped networking which is also part of how I make time for others. So many people wait until it’s too late to build their network. Or worse, they only build a network that is intended to benefit them. I’m connected to many individuals who won’t ever be clients of mine. I’ve learned a lot from them. Plus, I’ve been able to connect many of them to others in my network and they have formed mutually beneficial relationships. 

What is your morning routine?

My morning routine has fluctuated over the years. As I’ve grown in business and leadership, I’m constantly evaluating how I run my day. In the first three years of business, I woke up at 5 am (or the equivalent when I was traveling abroad) without fail. While it was pivotal for me to wake up at 5 am – the time you wake up doesn’t create magic. It’s what you do with the time you are awake. 

I no longer wake up at 5 am because it doesn’t serve me. Changing the time I wake up in the morning was physically easy. The mindset of waking up at 7 am was hard. I felt incredibly guilty. Reading so many articles of those who are successful and wake up at 5 am was a bad comparison trap for me. I had to remind myself over and again how I spend my time and run my day has changed. 

The most important thing about my morning routine is that I don’t get out of bed until I’m grateful and thankful for the day. It’s crucial for me to start the day positively and with the expectation that something great is going to happen each day. Sometimes this requires help in the form of a guided meditation, podcast, music, etc. I’m human and experience ups and downs, rejection, failure, and the list goes on. Each day is a gift and the expectation of myself is that I will be thankful for the gift of a new day.

Now I wake up at 7 am, and once I get out of bed, begin my day by checking my emails. This has been reported as not good psychologically for most people but I’m not most people. If checking email is going to change your mindset or mood for the entire day then I wouldn’t recommend it. My working style has always been to assess the day first and plan accordingly. It’s like checking the weather for the day. It doesn’t change my mood or mindset. It does let me know if I need to bring a jacket or dress for warm weather.  

My calendar could be used as a legal document and I make sure I run my day. The day doesn’t run me. My calendar is designed for me to be doing my best work at the best time. If I wake up to emails and messages that are urgent I will adjust my day accordingly.  In six years, I can count on one hand how many meetings I have had to reschedule. That’s the great part of having control over your day and designing a calendar for your best work – you have fewer emergencies and far fewer issues that are urgent.

Otherwise, most days I start my day with analytical work including editing, I do my best to schedule podcasts, meetings, and interviews in the afternoon when I begin winding down. I finish my day writing because it’s when I’m most creative and naturally write without editing as I go along. I don’t take Monday morning meetings (anything before noon) unless they are repeat clients or requests from my own team and the same goes for Friday afternoons. 

What most people are shocked to see is that my calendar has tons of empty time. Time where I have nothing scheduled. This is what I refer to as my “opportunity time”. If your day is packed all day, all week long that is a recipe for disaster and leaves no room to take advantage of opportunities without having to reschedule everything else. I can always add and fill my calendar with work. Missed opportunities don’t always come back around. 

What habit or behavior that you have pursued for a few years has most improved your life?

Reading books has had the biggest impact on life and what continues to improve my life. I read books on a variety of topics and learn from the best business leaders the world has to offer. However, the key is to read strategically and practice implementation. If your goal is simply to read more books each year and you never set aside time to thoughtfully implement what you’ve learned, you’ll simply be learning and not growing. There is a dramatic difference. 

What are your strategies for being productive and using your time most efficiently?

Being productive and being an assistant go hand in hand. I take my own advice often on this one and hire the right virtual assistants because I can’t do it all myself. My time is way too valuable to be learning skills that don’t translate into leadership. You won’t catch me watching YouTube videos for hours and trying to solve my own technical issues when I can pay someone far less to do a superior job. Being an executive assistant to incredibly smart and talented individuals taught me this very early on in my career. 

My strategies to be the most productive and successful have been, mapping out goals for the year, setting up my calendar accordingly for timelines, and, of course, hiring the right people. Without hiring the right people, you are at risk to never be productive enough to reach your goals and dreams. You are also at risk to burnout and either never meet your goals and achieve your dreams or significantly delay them. 

Factor in your personal life as well. People notoriously give themselves very ambitious goals and don’t factor in for family or friends. In order not to alienate your family and friends it’s a must to schedule time in advance with them and put it on your calendar as sacred. 

A big mistake I see people making is that they don’t want to come off as “too good” to do the “grunt” work. Instead of hiring a virtual assistant for even 10 hours a month, they continue to do everything themselves. Then one of two scenarios occurs. 

• They never grow their business in the way they want to because they are doing everything themselves. They aren’t acting like the CEO of their business. Every CEO has two jobs, hire the right people, and future proof your business.  
• They grow their business but because they’ve been doing it all themselves by the time they hire a virtual assistant they have to take several steps back because EVERY person you bring into your company must be properly onboarded in order to be successful. These types of individuals are basically running a business hacked with duct tape and something as simple as having to take a single sick day could ruin their entire month. 

In order for anyone to be productive, they must first define productivity. Once you define productivity then you can address being efficient. The thing about being a leader that no one tells you is that the bigger your reach and influence the more meetings you’ll be in. The more you’ll be teaching and leading others. The more time you’ll need to be thoughtful in your responses. You’ll need more time for yourself as well. This leaves you with less time for everything else. Even the things that are easy for you to do and have been doing for years.

Everyone gets the same 24 hours in the day. Not everyone measures productivity in the same way. Productivity is more than doing the things that need to get done. Emails may need to be responded to, but it doesn’t mean you have to respond to them. Most commonly people tell me that they feel productive when they do the things only they can do. The problem is these people haven’t grown into a leadership mindset yet to understand there is someone else that can do the job. Leaders typically measure a productive day by what they have produced or created. 

Productivity should be also measured by future funnels. I’ve watched numerous people fall prey to this – working on the now, but not creating the future. Your day or week cannot be productive if you haven’t future-proofed your business in some way, shape, or form. 

Having a productive day is not about achieving balance. The ratio is actually a 70/30 split. Your day/week should be spent creating and producing for your business as it stands now and what you want it to be in the future 70% of the time. The other 30% is doing the things that you must in order for your business to operate. Things can change quickly so it’s important to consistently evaluate what’s working and what isn’t. 

Don’t forget to tap into your feelings. You can answer every email and feel like the day was a waste. Or you can produce/create something and end your day feeling fantastic! The goal isn’t perfection. That will set you up for disaster. The goal is to string as many good and productive days together as possible. 

What book(s) have influenced your life the most? Why?

As an avid reader, there are so many wonderful books that have influenced me. It’s really hard to narrow down the list. In order to do so I am listing the books that had the most positive impact on me and my business when I first started in entrepreneurship. It’s been six years and I still refer to these books on a regular basis.

Drive by Dan Pink  – Understanding my true motivations at a deep level and learning to uncover the true motivations of my current and future clients was pivotal and impactful from the very beginning. Additionally, once I started following Dan Pink, I was exposed to many other great authors and leaders whom I now follow. It’s as if Dan Pink was dropping breadcrumbs along my own Yellow Brick Road. 

The Best Place To Work by Dr. Ron Friedman  – In order to become the premier Virtual Assistant Matchmaker in the industry I followed Dr. Friedman’s art and science formula. Dr. Friedman’s book opened my eyes to why I have always loved the companies I had previously worked for and how I could create the same experience for my clients, VAs, and in my remote work consulting.

Stand Out by Dorie Clark  – Very early on I knew I wanted to stand out from the crowd, so there was no better book than Dorie’s to make that possible. Dorie’s step-by-step approach to identifying your breakthrough idea and implement it is second to none. Furthermore, her subsequent books layered on Stand Out to not only solidify a foundation but grow and expand your business and idea(s). After reading Dorie’s book I began to follow her closely. I was fortunate enough to be a participant in her pilot course, Recognized Expert which is hands down the best online course available!

I could list literally dozens of books but without reading these three when I first started I don’t know if I would still be in business today. 

Do you have any quotes you live by or think of often?

Absolutely!

“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” – George Addair

“I didn’t start to stop.” – Betty Rocker (I don’t know if Betty Rocker originated this quote, but she is how I was made aware it. 

I was afraid of just about everything, including flying for most of my life. I suffered from anxiety attacks for over 15 years. After my committed suicide in 2012, I made it a point to begin facing my fears in a way that I never had to before. I needed to be strong and lead myself in a way I never thought possible so I could be strong and lead my children in a way I never thought I would be forced to.  Facing my fears worked!

I no longer have anxiety attacks and I overcame my fear of flying. In fact, shortly after overcoming my lifelong fear of flying I applied for my passport and in just four years traveled to 30 countries including an entire year abroad in 2017! 

When I first started my business, I had big dreams. The kind that scares you! The kind that people laugh at and tell you it can’t be done or someone else already has done it. I had no idea how to make my dreams come true. I embraced the quote, “I didn’t start to stop.” It became apparent that I didn’t always have to know how I would make my dreams come true. I just needed to start and not stop until they did. 

Each day that I didn’t stop working towards my dreams I’ve gotten closer to them. Not to mention I’ve experienced so many incredible moments along the way that I could have never dreamed of!